Story End

What should be end will be end at the right time,

it never have other way round.

If this is God's plan,

I will surrender.

I will hand up what I shouldn't get to God.

What Is Love To You

What is love to you.

Love, means nothing to me.

I am tired with love.

Love is pain, always.

Never ever trust love.

And do not regret.

LOVE The One Who LOVE You

Someone asked me, how are you?

And I was wondering how I gonna answer?

I am good? Not at all.

I am not good at all? Is that real.

As always, I am locking myself in the room,

not to talk, not to eat, not to do anything.

What is the intention I am doing it?

To get attention? Or just to make him worry about me?

Sometimes I was thinking,

He is the one, and the only one I will care, 

but I might be not the one he will care about.

So, what I am persistent with?

I am tired.

Should I just say, 

I wanna give up.

I promised myself, 

I will love myself more.

I am not gonna hurt myself.

But what I am doing?

I am hurting myself each and everyday.

You can spend time for a very dumb stupid game,

why don't you spend sometime to know more about me,

to know what I am thinking actually.

As I always say, 

if there is a scar,

the permanent mark will be with you forever.

Sometime, I was thinking why I always can't have a long lasting truth love.

Am I always choose the wrong one to love.

Yea, to be admit. 

I do have a very bad attitude. 

I understand not much people can stand for my temper.

But what to do, this is the real me.

I can't control myself to stop acting this way.

Okay, I am here to say Sorry to everyone who close to me.

Thank you for apologize.

Do love the one who love you.

Female is an very terror animal.

Sometime she will do things out of your mind.

Build A Perfect Relationship

A months and a months,

A weeks and a weeks.

The time is passing whisperly.

I am still the simple me,

he is still the same,

we are nothing much change,

the world are still means nothing to me.

I am really disappointed to the world,

and also towards him.

I have no idea how I gonna continue this dumb relationship.

I am tired.

Dream are always a dream,

it never turn to real.

As a female, I am sure most of you will wish to have a perfect relationship, a wonderful relationship,

like Cinderella and her prince story, 

but you know what, It always just a dream.

We had quarrel for thousands and millions time,

but what we get,

we get nothing after the fight.

He is still do what he like follow by his heart, 

and I am still  angry and get mad with what he did.

So pointless right.

I knew is not all your false sometime, 

maybe is my emotional controlled me.

From now on, 

let's try to practice my toleration. 

Not to get angry easily.

But to endure all the time,

no matter what.

Smile always,
cause Happiness is just a step away.

CHINESE NEW YEAR ❤

It's the last day of the year for Chinese year.

And I am still not in new year mood. 

Okay, I have to admit I don't like CHINESE NEW YEAR.

Chinese new year gave me a lots of bad memories since I was a child. sad right, for a kid.

Every years, the same. 

Me, and my family will not going back Muar (which is my parents home town) that early.

Which mean we will not have a thousand peoples reunion dinner, like other people's family.

We do have a biiggg family, but we don't used to do that.

My so call family is sooo different with other people's family. weird right.

So, reunion dinner means nothing to me.

My baby will be going back his home town for reunion dinner and celebration tomorrow.

What a happy thing right.

And I will be staying here until the black Friday, to go back Muar.

And yeah, I am gonna miss my husby like hell.

Duuuhhh, why must every time like that har.

My baby is not gonna die, is just temporary give me few days freedom.

And why can't I appreciate it har.

HAHAHAA.

My baby is gonna kill me if he see this.

Anyway, all this are just bluff myself, I will still miss him like hell.  

Christmas ❤

It's 24th of December. 02.49am.
Let's countdown for the Christmas.
And let's rock it. ❤

FCUKMYLIFE

Insomnia? LOL.
I can't even get into sleep although I am damn freaking sleepy.
My mind is like can't stop functioning, Can't stop thinking of the shity thingy.
Let's guess what am I thinking now,
HMMM, is shy to say, I am thinking about my final exam. =.=''
My second semester final exam is around the corner.
will be on 6th of January.
Peoples are taking 5 subjects for the final exam,
and the stupid me will be taking 7 subjectssss. FML.
Imagine how stupid am I, how useless am I.
Yea, of cause now you can give a big laugh on me.

Till now, the second semester.
I will still thinking, still asking myself,
what the hack are you so stupid to take this damn course that you don't like, that you can't able to handle.
Why are you so obey to parents when making this decision. You are holy shittttt.
And again, you can laugh at me now.

Seriously, I really can't able to stand when peoples around me can get a good result,
even they don't study much.
It's really kills me.
GOD, PLEASE HELP.

Since the time table for final exam is out,
that is an idea always popping on my mind,
- withdraw after the final exam -
This idea was suffering me for about oneees week more.
I was keep thinking stay back here to continue or just pack my stuffs and go back.
And it made me can't able to shittt like normally. FCUK MY ASS HOLE.
But after I 'digesting' this problem hard, and begging by my lovely baby,
I had decided to stay back here,
I have decided to study hard, to try hard.
Even I can't get a satisfied result.
I swear to my baby I will still staying back here,
I wont't leave him alone and giving change to other girls.
Baby, thank you for your promises.

NOT IN MOOD

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD,
ANYTHING WRONG WITH ME?
DID I WRONG?
WHY MUST EVERY TIME WE FIGHT LIKE THIS.
I WISH YOU ARE MY FOREVER,
BUT IT SEEM SO IMPOSSIBLE.
WHY? IS IT CAUSE OF ME? ABOUT MY ATTITUDE?
WHY?CAN SOMEONE HELP ME.
AND I AM FUCKING UP MY LIFE.

Study mood

Orh shitt, 

this is too bad. 

I can't concentrate on my study.

New Blog

A new blog.

A brand new life and a brand new me must start from a brand new place.

Since I have open a new account, 

means that I am not gonna update my old blogs any more,

that is too many unhappy memories to forget.

I just want a new start. 

I just realize that how stupid am I last time.

I did a lots of stupid dump things for you, 

but at the end I get nothing.

I cry for you, I huts myself just for a stupid you.

How much you huts me, 

and I do believe you will got it back one day.

I wish you luck.

Time gone fast, 

everything had changed.

But I am happy to changing into this.

I have been studying in the death town for almost four months,

although that is just a very very small town,

but it gave me a lots of happiness.

I get to know a gang of good friends,

they all treated me like their sister, 

and I felt that I am just like a small sister for them, 

although they always 'bully' me.

And now, I am having my first semester final exam.

I wish I can pass all the subject,

although I knew that is a impossible thing.

But, wish me luck.

I am so thankful that God have giving me him,

he is the most precious present that God had giving me.

I am so glad to have him be with me, 

and I will never let him go.

Once he is mine, forever he will be mine.

Yaa, I mean it. and

ILOVEYOUMYSWEEYHEART  ♥